I’m so confused

So apparently some lame-ass conservative group sets up a “sting” to try to get NPR to look bad. During the meeting between senior vice president for fundraising, Ron Schiller and men posing as members of a fictitious Muslim Education Action Center Trust, Mr. Schiller made the following statements:

— “The Tea Party is fanatically involved in people’s personal lives and very fundamental Christian — I wouldn’t even call it Christian. It’s this weird evangelical kind of move.”

— “Tea Party people” aren’t “just Islamaphobic, but really xenophobic, I mean basically they are, they believe in sort of white, middle-America gun-toting. I mean, it’s scary. They’re seriously racist, racist people.”

— “I think what we all believe is if we don’t have Muslim voices in our schools, on the air … it’s the same thing we faced as a nation when we didn’t have female voices.”

He also suggested that public radio might be able to survive if government funding were cut off. Hmmmm, those sound like fairly reasonable assessments. The first two are observably accurate. I’m not so sure about the muslim voices  since I don’t personally think we need more religious voices, but I certainly wouldn’t make any efforts to stifle them.

It seems that the powers at NPR don’t like their people to go around saying things that are true about Tea Partiers. Heaven forbid that journalists tell the fucking truth about a bunch of frigging lunatics. No, that would demonstrate bias or something. I don’t know about you, but being biased towards objective reality sounds like a pretty damn good bias to me.

Dana Davis Rehm, NPR’s senior vice president of marketing, communications and external relations, released the following statement:

We are appalled by the comments made by Ron Schiller in the video, which are contrary to what NPR stands for.

So telling the truth about the Tea Party is “appalling” and “contrary to what NPR stands for”? Fuck that noise. Grow some gonads, NPR. Stand up to the lunacy that is “fair and balanced” journalism and start telling the truth.

Oh, what’s that? NPR CEO Vivian Schiller has just resigned been kicked out over this? Never mind.

,

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-03-06

  • Giant peanut! #
  • You, too, can experience the thrill of the giant peanut! http://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/2071 #
  • I'm back in the nation's wang. W00t. 😛 #
  • The only mood-altering drug I need is good porn. #myphilosophyoflife #
  • If I'm not in over my head I'm not learning anything. #myphilosophyoflife #
  • Billboards on the highway for hotels that show adorable sleeping puppies are cheating. #
  • Who is this Oscar person? #
  • Heartburn, make like a tree and get the hell out of my chest. #
  • I pretty much agree, though he left out the Mighty Eagle. I'm still on the fence on this one. http://theoatmeal.com/comics/angry_birds #
  • This->The gender smörgåsbord http://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2011/02/gender-smorgasbord.html #
  • What could be better than Doctor Who + LEGO? http://bit.ly/eRt8wD #
  • In case you had any doubts about how fucked up, #antisex #antiwoman Catholic dogma is: http://bit.ly/gdRWQB #fb #
  • How is it that so many stupid people work for software companies? #
  • When poop puns meet space puns: http://www.explosm.net/comics/2341/ #
  • I completely forgot to show y'all my new Docs! http://gdzl.la/9n4B4p #
  • Feces are impacting against rotating air circulation devices here at work. I'm just laughing & pointing at the ppl in the splash zone #
  • At another big fat Greek birthday party at a (sorta) Greek restaurant. A wee bit noisy. Big surprise 😉 #
  • Very cool! RT @mari_ness: I'm the featured poet in this month's Ideomancer, with interview and three poems: http://www.ideomancer.com/?p=599 #
  • What she said–> RT @Mrs_Skwirl42: Slept, kinda. Awake, sorta. Grumpy, lotsa. #
  • I have determined that I suck at Alice's Army as much as I do at CCGs IRL #KoL #
  • What she said–> RT @pervocracy: New post! "Good, Giving, Game." http://t.co/obdYTyW Dan Savage… not really takedown, but commentary. #
  • Not sure of the new iPhone @twitter app update. Autocomplete is great but the trending bar that keeps popping up is annoying as fuck. #
  • I really like Rage Against The Machine. #pointlesstweet #
  • RT @pervocracy: New post! Probably better thought out then the last one! "Face beyond beauty." http://bit.ly/eoNib5 #
  • At the Turkey's first real game! #
  • I totally could have been a tyrannical dictator except for the whole being a slacker thing. #
  • All in all it's a fair trade off. Being a dictator is nothing but work, work, work. Don't let the glamour of Kim Jong Il fool you. #
  • Baseball is booooooring. There. I said it. #
  • A parent just shouted, "Get a run and I'll give you a hundred dollars!" I'm hoping this was done in just. #
  • Jonesing for an #angrybirds update #
  • Black handkerchief, back left pocket. Any significance? #
  • I love ice cream sandwiches. #pointlesstweet #
  • Game over. Now we're going to Hot Dog Heaven for lunchie-munchies 🙂 #
  • I still love my Doc's #pointlesstweet http://t.co/HLnFEgd #
  • My wife's grandmother is crazy. "I can't go shopping, I heard on Fox that the orientals are blowing up the dams." What is she hearing?! #
  • My son just told me he's sick of my stupid "your mom" jokes. I told him that his mom was sick of my stupid jokes. #
  • Everybody wants some http://t.co/xbX4GBw #
  • Oh. Em. Gee. http://t.co/T2l6wfj #
  • I would SO have fun with this! #dragonage http://t.co/3GN0HLs #
  • I made it out of the comic book store without buying anything. Undecided if that's a good thing or not. #
  • #iftwitterwashighschool I'd be a total freaking rock star from Mars #
  • How painful are eyebrow piercings? Like on a scale from 1 to OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO DIE! #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-02-27

  • Done at the clinic. Nothing new; no ear infection, just lots of congestion & drainage. SOP #
  • Who knew canuckistan was such a dangerous place?! http://twitpic.com/42bz3a #
  • If I'm gotta go, I want it to be like this: http://www.explosm.net/comics/2332/ #
  • A 3-meter long #LEGO ship. I feel so inadequate http://www.mocpages.com/moc.php/253061 #
  • For once I am NOT pleased to realize that it's a day later in the week than I thought it was. Gotta get shit done today 😛 #
  • I'm retweeting this from one of those phones. From a ground car 🙂 RT @RedheadLassie: I loved today's xkcd: http://xkcd.com/ #
  • Gotta love the future. Left my work notes at home. @JSWadley took a picture of them and texted to me! #
  • My little turkey is having his first scrimmage practice in uniform. He's in center field 🙂 #
  • They don't enforce on-deck areas; someone's gonna get a bat in the mouth the way these kids just swing bats around :-/ #
  • Turkey got a hit! Made it to third! #
  • Seconded! RT @RigPants_OFace: I love sleep and sleep loves me. There, I said it and I'm not ashamed. #
  • What day of the week is it? #
  • In the office parking lot for the launch #
  • Congrats on reaching space, Discovery! Beautiful launch. #
  • Jebus. Listening to NPR. On the phone with guy in Lybia. Listening to explosions & gunfire. Opposition took over 5 tanks! 0.o #
  • Hiccups + heartburn = uncomfortableness #
  • I left my goddamn mother fucking wallet at home & I have to fucking drive back to fucking get it & be late. Also, I have hiccups. #
  • Wow. There's a band from the 80's called Blow Monkeys. They're not as good as you would think. #
  • When did Quadaffi change the spelling of his name? #
  • Wrestling with SQL on DB2/AS400 😛 #
  • My last job was integrating with a COBOL CICS system on the OS/390 that ran on VSAM flat files! #
  • Wow, my keyboard is dirty. Maybe I should stop eating lunch at my desk. Nah! #
  • I meant to include photographic evidence of my slovenliness in my last tweet. http://gdzl.la/9kYUTu #
  • This!! -> http://thisisindexed.com/2011/02/damn-science/ #provax #autism #vaccines #
  • Done with work, hitting the road to Atlanta to see the incomparable @kelleytastic! #
  • I hope that @Scarleteen is still around in 5-6 years when my kid is a teen. What a fantastic resource! in reply to Scarleteen #
  • Want!!! I still geek-out when I see one of these! http://gdzl.la/9m2UAy #
  • Few things can compare to the awesomeness of Richard Cheese covering NiN's Closer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqPpn2vbgYA&sns=em #
  • Passing Gainesville. All the Gators fans in the house, lemme hear you shout! #
  • It's been almost 20 years since I've performed Carmina Burana. I still love singing along with it. 🙂 #
  • Georgia. I am in you. #
  • Giant peanut! #
  • That is one beef rib. http://gdzl.la/9mfDHe #
  • The bone. http://gdzl.la/9mfG8H #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-02-20

  • Someone, somewhere, is regretting issuing me a blog license http://bit.ly/ghGkQT #
  • Top my bottom #rejectedcandyhearts #
  • It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Blog post by me? Definitely leaning towards worst http://bit.ly/ghGkQT #
  • I'm dying. Just in case anyone cares. #
  • In other words, I have a cold and am being melodramatic 😛 >>RT @CyberLizard: I'm dying. Just in case anyone cares. #
  • I'm dying. I think I have malaria. #
  • I think I've headed off the malaria before it turned into ebola. I may just live through this. #
  • If you're the vice president of the teachers union I would think that using proper grammar during an interview would be required. #
  • I'm alive. And at work. Don't push it. #
  • Who knew recovery from malaria would be so quick. I'm actually feeling human today. Just in time for a buttload of meetings today 😛 #
  • There's some sort of weird cop convention on the 417. I've seen cars from 6 different jurisdictions on the sides of the road. #
  • Corporate Training Summary: we're not going to train you to advance, only to allow you to get your job done. #
  • When, oh when will this dreary winter end? *snicker* http://gdzl.la/9iXjQk #
  • #protip RT @M1k303: Just learned the hard way: when you spit on a windy day, spit WITH the wind. #worksforpeeingtoo #
  • Max telling us about a play with just-so story about how spider got long legs. Concludes with "that's not true, they just evolved that way" #
  • We're at a BBQ restaurant. I have a feeling I'm going to go over a bit on calories today. #
  • That there is a mound of BBQ. http://gdzl.la/9iYvQT #
  • Wii fit is a lying sack of shit. there is no fucking way I've gained 1.8lbs >:-( #
  • OUTRAGE: House votes to bar Planned Parenthood from federal funding. Speak out. http://www.ppaction.org/IStandWithPP #StandWithPP #
  • How horrible a parent am I if the sound of my daughter's voice pierces my brain & drives me crazy? She finds the perfect frequency! #
  • An ant just bit me on the neck. Are there vampire ants? Should I be worried? #watchingtoomuchbuffy #
  • Whew! It's over 80f here! Guess summer's starting 😛 #

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It’s coming, I promise

Heehee, I said “coming”!

Ahem, as I was saying, the continuation of the very stimulating intellectual intercourse that began here is on its way. I have been struck down by what I suspect was malaria for the last few days and have been unable to do anything but lie in bed, shivering, begging the FSM to touch me with his noodly appendage and save my life. Oh, and finish Season 5 of Buffy. Apparently my supplications were successful, since I am now almost fully recovered. Just like Buffy at the start of Season 6.

At any rate, subsequent discussion, including imaginary arguments that I make up myself are on their way.

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You’re having sex with *how* many people?!?

Subtitle: Part One of an Ongoing Series Dedicated to the Deconstruction of  Arguments Against Polyamory or NAMBLA

This is not a fully researched, peer-reviewed, cited and documented critical analysis. You won’t find dry, scholarly lecturing using enormous words that only three people in the history of people understand the meaning of and one of those three people went insane in the 1960’s trying to decide whether it was an historic moment or a historic moment and is now wandering in the woods sans underwear, unavailable to answer questions. No, these are my thoughts, off the top of my head, about some arguments against polyamory that I made up off of the bottom of my head. Exactly why the top and bottom parts of my brain are having an argument is better left for a different blog post.

What is polyamory, you ask? I’m glad you asked, friend, glad you asked! Poly, from the greek poly meaning many; –amor, from the latin amor, meaning love; and –y, from the Aztec qxztyclx, meaning, well, no one is sure what it means and the scholarship is sorely lacking on exactly why it is considered part of the etymology of the word “polyamory” so for our purposes, we’ll simply ignore it. Therefore, polyamory directly translates into “many loves (plus that bizarre part we’re going to ignore)”. Polyamory is a having loving, intimate relationships with more than one person, all of whom are aware of all of the relationships. Consent and communication are at the core of this configuration. Let’s take a moment to visualize a standard-issue V-configuration (technical term) consisting of A) one person, B) another person and C) some third person who’s gender is inconsequential to our discussion and therefore is being omitted to preserve our feminist street cred. Now that we’ve all pictured a hot threesome with myself, Captain Jack Harkness and Kathy Ireland, let’s get back to our V-configuration. Person A is in a loving, intimate relationship with person B. Person B is in a loving, intimate relationship with person C. Person C may or may not be interested in Captain Jack Harkness, but that’s beside the point. The point is that there are multiple loving, intimate relationships between these three people that they are all aware of and consent to. Ergo, polyamory!

Perhaps the easiest way to understand polyamory is to contrast it against its non-identical cousin monogamy. Even though monogamy prefers to go by its nickname from high school, The Bull, we’re going to refer to it as monogamy because The Bull is a really stupid nickname that deserves to be left among the detritus of other high school memories such as wedgies, swirlies and that one time you threw up on that really cute girl’s shoes at the dance in the gym. Monogamy should be familiar with anyone who is familiar with Disney World. At Disney World they have these new-fangled contraptions called monorails. These monorails are similar to their sibling duorails only, being born second, they got shafted in the inheritance department and only ended up with one single rail. Hence we now refer to anything that only has one something as mono. Monogamous people are people who only have one gamy. Since the word gamy is offensive to the indigenous peoples of the south antarctic island of Halakalmoniqua, we’re going to use its more popular (and arguably less offensive) synonym, spouse.

To summarize, monogamous people only have one spouse or partner. Polyamorous people have >1 partners. That’s pretty much it. Simple. Non-complex. Quite straightforward.

Or so it would seem. Not everyone on the third planet orbiting a medium sized yellow star called Sol is cool with the whole >1 part of polyamory. Hence, conflict. Hence, strife. Hence, turmoil. Hence, this blog.

What possible problem could anyone find with >1? In a great number of areas of life, having >1 of something is considered a point of pride. In the case of money the further one gets from 1 in a positive direction on the number line, the more wealthy one is considered. In the case of relationships, this dynamic changes. That’s what we are going to be discussing in this epic, sensational, only partially fictionalized ongoing series of blog posts.

Kathy Ireland in a bikini

I used to have this picture of Kathy on the inside of my locker door in high school.

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-02-13

  • .@kingmabus2334 Keep 'em coming, dude! You're excellent comedy relief! #
  • We are back in civilization! #
  • You can get a harness and walk them. They generally poo in one specific place all the time. Oh, and warm baths set off their need to poo. #
  • The only reason I *might* watching the Super Bowl is because in one of the commercials there's a clue to unlock a level in Angry Birds #
  • Me: We've reached the sitting on the sofa tweeting together stage. @mrs_skwirl42: Achievement unlocked! #
  • One year ago I met the canuckistanian love of my life in person. Who knew a cross-continental romance could stay so strong? <3 @Mrs_Skwirl42 #
  • I <3 my lil sis RT @iambasspro: @CyberLizard helping with my shirt! He was my hero when I was little! I love him! http://twitpic.com/3xlrr1 #
  • If a "your mom" joke is good enough for Mohammed, they're good enough for me! http://www.jesusandmo.net/2011/02/08/birth/ #
  • We just had an all-hands corporate meeting. It was all about handling balls & growing pipelines. A good time was had by all. #
  • Awww, aren't they cute! (@Mrs_Skwirl42)http://yfrog.com/hsppsipj #
  • The Catholics have an app. For confession. *headdesk* http://n.pr/fVnoGG #
  • Apparently, being a father requires shouting instructions to your kid out on the field. Funny, I thought the coaches were supposed to teach. #
  • It is funny how much advice I'm remembering from my baseball days. All 2 seasons of it 28 years ago. #
  • Damn, some of these kids are more ADHD than I am! Though I was more of the dreamy, distracted type than hyper & annoying as hell. #
  • So next week practice starts at 7:30 and goes to 9pm. That seems crazy for a bunch of 8-9 yr olds. Bed time is 8 at our house. #
  • Word nerd! @CyberLizard scored 531 in The Times #WordNerd test. Discover your score at: http://thetim.es/word-nerd #
  • Because, really, Jesus with lasers would be really cool http://www.explosm.net/comics/2321/ #
  • Argh! My day is now filled with an unresolved tension! http://xkcd.com/859/ #
  • My todo list is fucking huge. Sometimes being a slacker takes a lot of work *sigh* #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-02-06

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-01-30

  • And I'm headed back home to change. Forgot it was business casual today; hafta put real pants on 😛 #downwithpants #
  • Least quoted bible verse: Bruce 4:69 "Bend over, therefore, and let the Lord come in to your soul." #
  • This is EXACTLY what happened to me! http://bit.ly/eGdUNe #
  • Did DM just make first contact with me? RT drmabusa1991: @CyberLizard @aagblog THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION – JAN 1, 2011OMENS OF DEATH: #
  • I nominate @NASA for a Shorty Award in #science because, srsly, people are living in SPACE. On a SPACE STATION!!! #
  • Ooh, Randi and @edbrayton? Fun! RT @jref: James Randi interview on Declaring Independence with Ed Brayton http://bit.ly/e5zjF0 #
  • I am going home to sleep off this stupid sinus infection. That or get out the dremel tool to relieve pressure. #
  • Good morning twitterverse! My sinuses don't feel like they're going to make my eyeballs pop out today! #
  • On my way home. That is all. #
  • The internet has no idea how fortunate it is that it can't transmit smells from this room. #
  • Goddamn jesus chicken RT @queerunity: Chick-fil-A Tied to Anti-Gay Funding Campaigns http://alturl.com/brsrg #LGBT #
  • Must. Resist. Table of death http://gdzl.la/9dz3qf #
  • Because who doesn't love a heartwarming story about stray dogs? http://bit.ly/i0zatc #
  • <insert naughty response> 😉 RT @RedheadLassie: Working is hard when a kitty wants your attention… http://twitpic.com/3tvc0k #
  • #KoL combat macros are kewl! #
  • They better not give me trouble for the 4.5" in my pants! RT @crazywtf: Airport sec off brand 3" toy gun "firearm" http://bit.ly/hCEARH #
  • The hammer is my penis. #
  • .@palmd One should never go too long without a dose of Joss. in reply to palmd #
  • Wow, evil+sociopath RT @dazzleeyes: RT @StopBeck: Well, @MonsantoCo is now sponsoring Glenn Beck. \\ Yikes! Now we have to double boycott! #
  • Boo! #downwithpants RT @dazzleeyes: Ladies and Gentlemen: I have gotten dressed. #
  • Wow, a death threat by DM in the same breath as @szvan @pzmyers! Does this mean I've made the big leagues? 😀 #
  • Linux>Mac>Your mom>Windows #
  • I <3 sandhill cranes. They're only 1 meter tall dinosaurs, yet they'll take on anything. Like the one I just saw threatening a car. 🙂 #
  • What she said -> RT @RedheadLassie: Today is busy and crazy. Blah. #
  • Annual review, I despise thee. #
  • Holy Flatulence, was I busy today! And it's not over yet. Got a bday party to go to, then back to code 😛 #
  • As a parent, this makes perfect sense to me >RT @palmd: Parenthood, Not Abortion, Linked to Mental Illness – http://nyti.ms/eEJXzm #
  • I still cringe every time I hear "Go for throttle-up" #challenger #
  • I'm at Papou's big fat Greek birthday party 🙂 #
  • Fuck, sensory overload. These Greeks are loud! And I'm starving. #introvert #
  • Fuck. The. GOP. RT @Noadi: House GOP wants to redefine "rape" http://bit.ly/gYLDyp #
  • . @JSWadley's cousin has a magnificent ginger beard. I'm feeling inadequate. :-/ #beardenvy #
  • I haz a yummy! http://gdzl.la/9dVbom #
  • I hate moving. Really. A lot. Like, a whole lot. I would seriously consider giving up a testicle if it would get me out of moving. #
  • I am so weak and out of shape. It's really quite pitiful. #
  • Since I've received questions, I'll clarify 😉 I hate moving house. Passionately. #
  • And to further clarify, I am helping my dad move today. I will be moving my household probably in a few months. #
  • Note to self: Your mom jokes are awkward when used on your siblings. #protip #
  • Finally heading home. Lower back tight but not spasming, so that's good. Ready for a shower. #

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-01-23

  • Statements like this from our elected reps cause me to despair for our nation RT@edbrayton: Dumbass Quote of the Day… http://bit.ly/fcS6QR #
  • "Come to the golden-brown side!" "Delicious yummy pancake am I" "Must be another drill" http://gdzl.la/9aFBBG #
  • Doing important culinary science #scio11 #notreally http://gdzl.la/9aCCWV #
  • Who knew I would like dick so much! http://gdzl.la/9aFVsN #
  • The sad part about making epic breakfast? You still have to clean the kitchen. 🙁 #
  • Butts county <insert appropriate rear-end pun or wisecrack here> #
  • Would I giggle more if I lived in Butts County, GA or Cumming, GA? #
  • Giant peanut! #
  • FLORIDA I AM IN YOU #
  • Watch and Download Movies Online – http://goo.gl/ka3Ud #
  • Watch and Download Movies Online – http://goo.gl/YbX4U #
  • Just finished Time Bandits. Forgot what a strange movie that was. #
  • About to show my kids @peeweeherman's Big Adventure for the first time! #
  • "I pity the fool who don't eat my cereal!" #
  • "You don't want to get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Dottie; a rebel." I tell this to all the girls; it's good advice. #
  • http://goo.gl/D0adR #
  • Watch and Download Movies Online – http://goo.gl/xovkn #
  • Hey, @twitter, what's up with this Mobile Web connection that keeps getting approved after I unauthorized it & why is it sending spam?! #
  • Gotta love the Vatican! RT @nytimes: Vatican Warned Bishops Not to Report Child Abuse http://nyti.ms/hCZAzP #fb #
  • Whew! Head-down coding all day today, but I made that AS400/RPG/Java process my bitch! #
  • *sigh* I suppose I'll get up now. 😛 #
  • Did NOT want to get up this morning. Stupid work, bribing me with stupid money to make me come in. #
  • New post: With apologies to Simon & Garfunkel http://bit.ly/gJCRe3 #
  • I'll believe it when I see it RT @thinkgeek: Duke Nukem Forever set for 5/3/11 US release, 14 years after being 1st ann: http://j.mp/edADcL #
  • Poor, poor, misunderstood vatican :'-( RT @BibleAlsoSays: Vatican says its Irish abuse letter misunderstood http://tinyurl.com/4caeh6h #
  • "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends" #lyrics Proposing #polyamory or #groupsex #
  • This is why I don't get invited to karaoke: http://bit.ly/gJCRe3 #
  • Anyone play the Call of Cthulhu card game? http://bit.ly/i9n43H Seems intriguing. #
  • My son is kicking my arse at Spellfire :-/ #
  • Up early on a Saturday but it's for a good cause; @JSWadley & I are going to paint happy little trees at a Bob Ross workshop! 😀 #
  • A painter is me! http://gdzl.la/9cc4Ng #
  • Art! http://gdzl.la/9cini9 #
  • I had fun painting happy little trees! I want to do it again, same painting, now that I know what I'm doing 😉 #BobRoss #
  • Boy, religious people will find anything to worship! http://gdzl.la/9ch7T6 #
  • .@jswadley is rocking out in the car to Erasure. I don't wanna hear any more about my 80's music thing. 😉 #
  • Things you don't want your date to have to say to you: "Can you please stop talking about whale penises now?" I blame @scicurious #

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