Archive for June, 2009
There is all kinds of weird shit out there on teh intertubes. Two girls, one cup. One man, one jar. BTW, if you don’t know what those mean, DO NOT google them. Seriously, you’re better off not knowing. See, you shouldn’t have googled it. I warned you.
Anyway, this morning I saw probably the weirdest (read “awesomest”) use of the net I have yet seen. It started over at Almost Diamonds. Then it spread. If you’ve got a short attention span, or a really slow internet connection (you’re not still on dialup, are you? If so, please join us in the 21st century) you can get the synopsis at Pharyngula.
Jason, you’re one lucky dude. Or canuck. Whatever. Congrats!
Jodi, how awesome are you for conceiving and setting up a modern-day romantic adventure across the web.
I couldn’t decide whether to LMAO or throw up. The EPIC FAIL that is fundies never ceases to amaze me. I stumbled upon one of their Facebook groups.
Put Christ Back Into Schools*
Allow freedom of teaching of the Bible by all teachers in all schools across America.
Education – Elementary and Secondary
*We believe every teacher should have the right to teach the Bible at any time. Please note: To clearify, this group is for teaching of the entire Bible, and only the Bible. According 1st Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America, every person has the right to religion. Why is praying/reading of the Bible not allowed in most schools?
Let’s go ahead and take a look at the actual text of the 1st Amendment, shall we?
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
The first sentence is what the ignorant fundies are talking about: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;…” This is widely regarded as designed to prevent the establishment of a state religion by the government. It is also interpreted by the Supreme Court to mean that the government cannot promote one religion over another (Board of Education of Kiryas Joel Village School District v. Grumet, 512 U.S. 687 (1994), Justice David Souter, writing for the majority, concluded that “government should not prefer one religion to another, or religion to irreligion”.)
What this group advocating the return of “Christ” to the classroom is seeking is inherently unconstitutional. They make this clear in their position statements: “Allow Teaching of and only the Bible by teachers at any time to students anytime.” Right there, see that? They want the government to promote their bible over any other religious text. And just in case we missed it, they’ve got an asterisk note:
We believe every teacher should have the right to teach the Bible at any time. Please note: To clearify[sic], this group is for teaching of the entire Bible, and only the Bible.
C’mon, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that this is clearly discriminatory and blatantly unconstitutional. Why should your mythology get preferential treatment over any other?
According [sic] 1st Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America, every person has the right to religion. Why is praying/reading of the Bible not allowed in most schools?
Why is this so fracking hard to understand: every student has the absolute right to pray/read the bible in school. No one has argued that they don’t have that right or shouldn’t have that right. What we’re trying to avoid is having the schools (aka the government) impose your mythology in our institutes of education.
Let me put it in a way that even fundies can understand. Let’s say your kid came home and told you that their teacher was telling them that Odin created the world and that if they died in battle they would get to go to Valhalla. I can safely say that you would be mildly concerned. It’s the same thing for the rest of us when our kids come home saying that teacher said that their going to hell unless they worship some dude named Jesus. School is about edumacation, not indoctrination. Students should be learning about the factual realities of the world, devoid of any religious trappings.
I know I’m just preaching to the choir here (no pun intended). Any fundie who reads this isn’t going to get it. “That’s completely different,” they’ll say. “The bible is real, not like that other crap about multiple gods or (god forbid) no god at all!”
All we can do is to try to keep our voices heard and promote the strict enforcement of the separation of church and state. This isn’t just an atheist issue. It affects all of us who support a secular government and an educational system based on fact, not mythology.
Here are some resources:
ACLU – American Civil Liberties Union
NCSE – National Center for Science Education
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives
There is a lot of stuff going on out there in the big bad world. I can hardly wrap my mind around it all, at least not enough to make a coherent post yet. So here’s a couple of things off the top of my head:
Posted by CyberLizard in Uncategorized on June 15, 2009
When a tiny peaceful world was invaded, they found themselves with a desperate need for armed starfighters. The only spacecraft they possessed that had a decent amount of speed and toughness were used by the Planetary Meter Service, or PMS. These “meter-maids” darted about the myriad orbital facilities, enforcing parking rules and issuing citations for improperly parked starcraft.
With the addition of a hyper-booster, armor, maneuvering wings and twin laser cannons, the Meter-maid made quite a sturdy little starfighter. The enhanced speed combined with the PMS pilots in-depth knowledge of the intricacies of the orbital docking platforms made this squad extremely successful.
This post by Sara over at Orcinus hits the nail squarely on the head. Sometimes I have to wonder if a certain political party has been hit squarely on the head as well.
Your fellow Americans demand an answer — and we want it now. Just one simple question:
Are you deliberately trying to start a civil war?
Just answer the question. Yes or no. Don’t insult us with elisions, evasions, dithering, qualifications, or conditional answers. We need to know what your intentions are — and we need to know NOW. People are being shot dead in the streets of America at the rate of several per month now. You may not want responsibility for this — but the whackadoodles pulling the triggers make no bones about who put them up to this.
Damn straight. This shit’s starting to get scary out there. I talked a while back about the possibility of Civil War v2.0. Are we witnessing the next Fort Sumter? Canada’s looking better and better. Ok, not really. Too damn cold. But you know what I mean.
Thank you, WorldNutDaily, for clearing up our misconceptions about James von Brunn, the psycho who thought it would be fun to shoot up a Holocaust museum. See, in a WND “Exclusive” (which means that only they are fucked up enough to take credit for printing this kind of garbage) Bob Unruh reveals the real motivation behind von Brunn’s rampage: Darwin made him do it! Seriously, they reveal all in their headline: Darwin-loving museum shooter hates Bible, Christians
James von Brunn, the man who allegedly shot and killed a guard at the Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington, D.C., was a Darwin-lover who hated the Bible and Christians, and defies media efforts to classify him as a stereotypical “right-winger,” according to report.
As the kids say, that’s a bold statement (The kids do say that, right?). This report must have some concrete evidence to back up a claim like that. Where did that report come from?
The Moonbattery blog revealed von Brunn advocated the socialist policies espoused by Adolf Hitler and used Darwinian theory to support his anti-Semitism.
Holy shit. A paranoid, conspiracy theorizing, hate and fear mongering site using another paranoid, conspiracy theorizing, hate and fear mongering site to back up their paranoid conspiracy theories.
Dammit, my irony meter just asploded.
The best part is that they can call him a “Darwin-lover” is because he dug Hitler and, as we all know, Hitler was Darwin’s best-man at his wedding. They used to go down to the local bruehaus and knock back shots together, before crafting plans to further the dominance of the Aryan race through eugenics.
I’m torn between wanting to laugh my ass of at the incredible lack of any sort of reasonable thought process in these people, and wanting to weep with the futility of trying to maintain sanity while fricking idiots like these are doing their damnedest to twist the world into the sick fantasy that exists in their own heads.
Posted by CyberLizard in Uncategorized on June 11, 2009
That’s it. I’m convinced. There is a god and the end-times are upon us. There is photographic proof.
Ok, boys and girls, if you’ve ever wanted to hang with a famous blogger, now’s your chance. I will be at a special showing of “The Jerk” at the Enzian Theater in Maitland, FL @ 9:30pm tonight. It’s a private showing just for me and my faithful Lizardlings (and anyone else who buys tickets. But we’ll just ignore them).
As an added bonus, you get to meet the man from who’s loins the CyberLizard sprang!
So come on down and join the fun. I’ll be the one in a bathrobe with my pants down around my ankles carrying a chair. Because I’m just that into it.
p.s. I’m not really famous. And I probably will be wearing pants. But don’t let that stop you.
My latest LEGO creation: AT-HV/AA
The AT-HV/AA (All Terrain-Hover Vehicle/Anti-Aircraft) is a medium duty surface effect vehicle. Multiple configurations/weapons loadouts make it ideal for a number of different roles.
This is the Anti-Aircraft configuration. Crew: 3 – One driver, one officer, one gunner.
I really like the underside of this guy:
Check out the whole set on Flickr